Best and Worst Places To Get High Part 2

Best and Worst Places To Get High Part 2

Last time we started listing some of the best and worst places to get high. I am trying to make this as actually useful as possible by making suggestions you may not have thought of, but yeah some of them are going to be common sense just in case. That’s not a dig, I have no common sense so what’s obvious to others usually isn’t to me. So without further faffing about, let’s get on with it. 

The Airport

This one is definitely up to the individual but generally I don’t think it’s a great idea to get high before you go to the airport. Primarily because if there is a place you don’t want to be paranoid this is it. Depending on where you live the airport is likely full of police or similar security, potentially with guns, who are constantly scanning areas and looking at people ascance. If you are high I promise you all it will take for you to look like the guiltiest person ever will be trying to make your face normal while one of these people makes eye contact with you for what seems like days. There can also be a lot of waiting around in airports to check bags, go through security, etc and that’s never fun when stoned. The last point I’ll make is that it’s likely going to be much harder to resist the urge to act like an idiot. Maybe that’s making a joke at the wrong time, accidentally giving the wrong answer for something, or zoning out at the point when people are asking you to come forward or do whatever airport stuff. Honestly, I would say just avoid it all together. 

Mountains/ Forests

There are umpteen reasons why mountains and forests are some of the best places to be high. First of all the sheer majesty of nature that will transport your stoned little brain into a completely new dimension of awe and zen. Have you seen mountains? They are pretty damn good. Personally I just love forests, I grew up in them so they have a real sense of calm for me. I mean I grew up in a semi-detached house but it had a forest near it. I wasn’t raised by badgers, despite what some people might tell you. You can do this a couple of different ways. Find yourself a beautiful forest or mountain area, have a smoke on your walk alone and either listen to the sounds of the wind and the animals or maybe listen to a podcast you love while you drink in the stunning environment. The other is to take a best bud or a couple of buds and go on an adventure. If you are planning a hike or a big walk then probably best to have people with you just in case. I’ll also say that I think cold, clear, crisp air is literally the best thing you can be inhaling when you’re high, other than the obvious. The bright frosty air will keep you alert and energetic while you enjoy your stroll through tall trees full of owls and so on probably. 

Visiting Someone In Prison 

Another one that might seem obvious but I dunno, this is really aimed at the people who smoke constantly and have a high tolerance so reckong they can be high anywhere. I’ve done prison visiting and though it may seem easy enough since you haven’t done anything wrong, it’s not. First of all you have to sit in this little depressing room that is usually filled with young women and small children. Then when you go in  you get fully searched and have to go through a bunch of scanners and even if you’ve never committed a crime in your life you’ll feel like one of the most prolific felon’s in human history. Also the anxiety was already enough for me to ask the guard searching me to take me for dinner first, so being high would likely have made that much worse. I don’t really need to go on telling you why, just don’t do this one. 

Hammock 

Literally any hammock anywhere, just get stoned in it. 

A Busy Supermarket

It may seem like the best idea to get stoned on a Saturday at around 5pm and then go shopping for snacks in your nearest massive Tesco’s, but you’re wrong. First of all, you will spend every penny you’ve ever made wading through the bog of gainful employment. You will buy things you don’t want, don’t like and have literally never heard of. Your brain will start with ‘mmmm cheese puffs’ and end up with ‘oh pickled herring, I met a Norwegian person once I should get this in their honour’. Second, the lights are going to mess with you. Even if you don’t have sensory issues, the enhancement provided to you by being high will pick up on those buzzing, violently white lights and will invite them to burrow right into the back of your brain. Third, I think I’m not going back to count, is the people. At this time of day on a weekend, let’s assume, is going to be heaving. While dealing with the overwhelming snack choices and the aggressive lighting the last thing you want is to be dodging elderly people with trolleys and no sense of personal space. Worse still, there might be children who want things they aren’t allowed and start making noise. 

Museums

Definitely one of my top places to be high for a number of reasons. It depends on what you’re interested in but often there are huge rooms of bizarre taxidermied animals, areas where you can play with science, sparkly rocks, all sorts of great stuff. Plus often they have multiple rooms where you can amuse yourself for hours with all sorts of varied sensory business. If it’s the kind of museum that has a cafe that’s all the better. You can go and see all the awesome stuff then have yourself a bunch of lovely snacks. For me I think museums have to be my absolute favourite place to get high.

Written by Tasha Porritt

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